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分手后千万不要做的5个决定!

2018-10-20    来源:elite daily    【      美国外教 在线口语培训

I really hate making big decisions. I think, overthink, and then think some more before finally pulling the trigger. This is my struggle, and it is real. But even if you happen to be comfortable and confident making decisions, there is one time when you want to avoid making any big, life-altering choices — and that is after a breakup, when you are emotionally raw and maybe even a little impulsive. The big decisions to avoid making after a breakup are any with major long-term effects. Now, that's not to say you shouldn't trust yourself to make big choices. You should absolutely feel empowered to steer your own destiny. I'm just suggesting you give yourself a little window of time to heal your broken heart, and if after that you still feel like moving to Thailand or shaving your head, then do you, boo.

我讨厌做重大的决定。我会想来想去,各种纠结,然后在准备决定之前再想一会儿。我就是这么一个优柔寡断的人。但是,就算你是一个对做决定感到舒服和自信的人,也要注意,有一个时候,千万要避免做决定(尤其是那种会有巨大改变的决定),那就是刚分手的时候。一般来说,你可能情绪会有点激动或者有点冲动。这里说的决定是那些会有长期重大影响的那些。我并不是说,你不应该信任自己的选择,你的命运完全掌握在自己手中。我只是建议,分手之后要给自己点时间去恢复、抚平受伤的心灵,如果在那之后,你还是想去泰国,或者想剃个光头,那就请便。
 
1. DRASTIC CHANGES TO YOUR APPEARANCE
彻底改变自己的外表
 


Changing your haircut after a breakup is pretty common. It’s a figurative and literal fresh start to your new life! While you probably shouldn’t go too far (as in going from waist-length hair to a pixie cut), hair grows back, so if you decide you really want a change, this one is less serious. However, other changes to your appearance are a bad idea right now. Don't schedule plastic surgery, or even a tattoo. Tattoos are awesome and meaningful and stay with you for life, but do you really want one that will remind you of your ex every time you look at it? Probably not. Here’s the trick: If you really want that tattoo, schedule it with an artist who is booked for months, so you have plenty of time to rethink the art as your heart heals.
分手后换发型很常见。这象征着一个新的开始!虽然最好不要一下子变得太厉害(比如从齐腰长发变成超短发),但是头发毕竟会长回来,所以如果你真的想有所改变的话,问题也不大。但是,对于外表上其他的一些改变,你可要考虑清楚了。不要马上安排整容,或者纹身。纹身挺好的,很有意义,会一直跟随着你,但是你确定你真的想要一个每次看到都会让你想到前任的纹身吗?应该不会吧。这儿有个小技巧:如果你真的想要一个纹身,你就预定一个要等好几个月的纹身师,这样,随着伤口愈合,你就有足够的时间来想清楚。
 
2. JUMPING INTO A NEW RELATIONSHIP
迅速开始一段新恋情
 


Oh yes, we’ve all been here: The rebound relationship. But that also means we’ve all been through the rebound breakup, and that is not fun. One of two things typically happens: After the initial excitement and new relationship energy fades, you realize you're not really into this person because your heart wasn’t ready, or it blows up and now you're dealing with heartbreak squared. While it may be tempting to avoid your feelings about your ex by finding a new boo, it might not be the best idea.
没错,我们都有过这样的经历:反复的感情。这也就意味着我们都经历过这种反弹的分手,这并不好玩。通常会有两种结果:在最初的兴奋过去后,新鲜感消退,一会意识到你并没有那么喜欢这个人,因为你还没有准备好;要么就是,你承受不了,再次分手,痛苦就会加倍了。虽然很多人会想通过开启一段新恋情的方式忘记前任,但也许这并不是一个好办法。
 
3. QUITTING YOUR JOB
辞职
 


Sometimes breakups can send you into an existential spin, and as a result, you may question every part of your life. But what you don't want to do is impulsively quit your job. What you need right now as you reassemble your life is some stability and the ability to pay your rent. So, if the breakup has you second-guessing other areas of your life like what you want to do with your career, then that’s fantastic. But make sure you begin exploring and pursuing your new and exciting path strategically, not by throwing your whole life into financial chaos.
有时候,分手可能会给你陷入自我怀疑的漩涡中,然后,你可能会开始质疑你的生活。但是,不要因此就冲动地辞职。当你准备开启新生活的时候,你需要一些稳定性和负担得起自己生活的能力。因此,如果分手能让你重新思考自己的生活,比如你的事业,那就非常棒了。但是要确保你是有计划地探索和追求新的自我,而不是鲁莽行事,让自己陷入财政危机。
 
4. MAKING A MAJOR PURCHASE
冲动购物
 


I am no stranger to retail therapy after a breakup, and if you want to do a little shopping with a broken heart, then I say more power to you. Unless, of course, that shopping is for any major purchase. If it requires financing or for you to dip deep into savings, this is most definitely not the time. Being impulsive about a major purchase like a car has long-term ramifications that will be making you want to break up with yourself when that bill comes due.
我对分手后的零售疗法一点也不陌生,如果你因为刚分手很难过想去逛逛街,那完全没问题。当然,如果是那种迟早要买的东西,就影响不大。如果是需要一大笔钱或者要你投资很多的,现在也许还不是时候。像买车这种重大的冲动购买也许会让你在看到账单的时候想跟自己分手。
 
5. MOVING FAR AWAY
搬到远方
 


If everywhere you look reminds you of your ex, you may really want to pack your bags and move far, far away. Remember what I said about deciding to move to Thailand on a whim? It sounds great in theory and when plucky heroines do it in movies, but if you're going to go down this path, just make sure you do it thoughtfully.
如果你觉得你的周围都会让你想起前任,你可能会想收拾东西搬得远远的。还记得我开头说的一时兴起去泰国吗?理论上听起来好像还可以,就好像电影中说走就走的女主。但如果你真的决定了,一定要想的周全。
 
Listen, I’m not saying you should never make these kinds of life-altering choices. Make them! Just not when you're fresh off a breakup. You deserve to go on adventures and follow your bliss, just make sure to do it thoughtfully rather than on a brokenhearted impulse.
我并不是说,永远不要做什么大的决定。只要确保你已经从分手的阴影里走出来了。人生却是需要一些旅程,要跟随自己的内心,只不过要确保你真的想好了,而不是因为分手而一时冲动。


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